It gets even better

This is my day today. Mind you it is only noon right now. There is still much more left to experience before bedtime.

Last night I put the dog in his crate. He happily and completely unexpectedly marches right in, curls up and closes his eyes. Cool. He won't whine. Thank you Lord. I was wiped out from the toilet/poop adventure earlier that all I wanted to do was crawl in bed and cry. That was at 9pm. At 3:30 this morning, that dog made such a fuss that I swear someone was torturing him. I didn't move right away seeing if he would stop. Thankfully he did. Crisis averted.

I wake this morning to take him outside. No need to because he used his crate for his toilet. GROSS. It was like one of those horror stories of the toddler who smears his poo all over his crib and the wall. The parent comes in and the kid is giggling. I swear that dog was giggling at me. I clean it all up and then get the kids up for school. Poor kids, they are awake for 2 seconds before they realize that mom is ticked off.

Everyone gets going and we are all out the door. I had to meet Chloe Reid at my mother-in-laws house to have her do a blood draw on Toni. I am already mad from the whole pooping thing yesterday and today. Now I have to witness needles, blood and rubber torture bands around the arm. I don't think I can take it.

Her veins are apparently uncooperative and Chloe has to work to make it happen. Every once in a while she would say what she was doing and I would feel the bottom drop out from below me. I HATE THIS. Now I have to hold Toni's arm because she is sleeping. Chloe is concerned that she will be startled and move her arm. I am now inches away from the gruesome event. She gets the needle in and Toni says OUCH a few times. Woozy is an understatement. I feel faint. Chloe is saying something about it not working then all of sudden she says "I got it, it's flowin'" Oh Chloe keep your comments to yourself. This is too much. I can feel a wave of heat rush over me and my bangs are now sticking to my forehead. Chloe is now more concerned about me than Toni.

Then it happened. Chloe said something like "ok" or "there" I can not remember. I think she is done and I look up. I saw it all. I saw the needle in her blue vein, I saw the blood flowing, I saw the vials, I saw the rubber glove and I swear I was going to puke. I didn't ..

Then get this, she hands me the vials and asks me to keep them turning to help the blood from coagulating. I am now TOUCHING the red vials containing my mother-in-law's blood. Too much. I am shaking right now recalling it. I am so traumatized that when she takes the vials from me, I am still shaking them. I have to tell myself to stop because I am not holding anything.

All done. Then she asks me to hold the gauze on Toni's arm. I swear to you right now that I felt it pulsating. I tel that to her and she laughs. This is nothing for her. For me, it is too much. And the whole time this is happening, Toni is sleeping. The only time she would rouse was when Chloe touched her with her cool hands. Other than that and her "ouch" she never opened her eyes. Un stinking believable. I need therapy for the ordeal and she snoozes through it all.

So, I get home and Lenny is home. He checks the toilet from last night and deems it ok. He uses it and flushes it. A few minutes later I see the dog in the bathroom sniffing. I look down and see that there is another flood in the bathroom. It is right at the threshold of our bedroom. I call him, throw down more towels and proceed with a repeat of last night. Thankfully though today is was all just water coming in through the pipe. Fresh water. Thank you God. But, gee whiz it is a mess and we are flooded. More shoes are wet but can be dried in the sun because it is just water. No poopy this time. We must have used 8 towels to mop it up. Oh my gosh.

I go outside to put the shoes on the table. The dog is out there gnawing on a moldy orange from our tree. I go to get the orange and he grabs it and runs. Then the orange gets caught in his mouth. Big orange Little wiener dog puppy mouth. He won't let me come near him because he knows that I will take it away. I say fine to him and let him go for it. Then Lenny comes out and gets it from him.

Mind you, it is only lunchtime. The kids aren't even home from school yet. There is still a great possibly of more adventures in this house.

AAARRRRRRRRRRggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh